The Empath and the Archetypal Drama Triangle by Elaine LaJoie

Author:Elaine LaJoie
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Empath and Relationships, Drama Triangle Archetypes, Spiritual Energy Healing, Personal Transformation Shadow Work, Enneagram Type Four, Soul Retrieval, Highly Sensitive Intuitive, HSP, Shamanic Energy Work
Publisher: Elaine LaJoie
Published: 2015-09-21T00:00:00+00:00

5 THE GUILT TRIPPING RESCUER

When we live on the Drama Triangle, our lives are confusing and painful. For Empaths, once we understand how we live as Victims and we give up the role, then we can move on to understanding the Rescuer side of the Drama triangle.

Someone who is used to being Rescued will usually guilt trip the Rescuer by saying something like, "How can you do this and make everyone else unhappy?" That person is depending on the Rescuer to rescue him and others from unhappiness. This is especially potent against someone with a Giving Persona. (See Motivations of the Empath ebook for a fuller description of the Giving Persona.) However, when the Rescuer guilt trips, the Rescuer is much more manipulative. The Rescuer helps others while having a hidden agenda. Usually this agenda is unconscious even to them. Without knowing it the Rescuer's agenda usually goes along the lines of, "I am doing this for you, so you owe me forever. If you don't pay me back the way I want, then you have taken advantage of me." Another assumption the Rescuer makes is that the person being Rescued always has less power than the Rescuer. In other words, the Rescuer is needed and necessary.

For someone who is not on the Drama Triangle and is simply interacting with the Rescuer as if all exchanges were equal, voluntary, and final with each exchange, it can be an unpleasant surprise to find that they have been dealing with a Rescuer, especially when it becomes clear to the Rescuer that he isn’t needed after all.

I have had this happen to me with clients. Many times I have former clients come to me, asking me if they can pay for sessions for a friend or loved one. In a few cases, it is a Rescuer asking for help for his friend. The classic Rescuer uses strong-arm tactics such as, "You must let me pay for the session because she won't be able to afford the energy work in any other way, and she really needs it." In such cases the Rescuer is depending on my also being a Rescuer or else I might not be moved to help his disempowered friend. This person doesn't realize he is acting inappropriately; he is so entrenched in Rescuing others. In these cases it is easy to remove myself from the invitation to enter the Triangle by telling them how I do third party payments (which is the exchange of money must happen between them, and then the friend can hire me directly.) Then the friend can exercise his power and choose to work with me, with an investment and the sobering experience of money changing hands.

In a more manipulative case, I had a client who loved my work, had referred many people to me, which I greatly appreciated, and had also had several sessions with me. However, when this client’s wife missed a session with me with no notice at all and an inadequate excuse, and I held her to my usual terms for missed sessions, my client was enraged.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.